Crazy Things People Say

As most of you may know by this time, our days in Japan are numbered. In fact, we will be moving back to the U.S. before the summer is over. I was thinking back over my time here as an English teacher, and I wanted to make a list of some of the funniest things my Japanese/Chinese/Korean students have said to me....So here they go:


1. "So, how is California life? Oh, you aren't from California? Then, how is it living in New York?" Yes, that is right. Most students that I met would inevitably assume that I was from California because I have blond hair. When I told them that I was not from California then it was assumed I must be from New York...because these are the only two places that exist in America. I even had one student say he was disappointed that I wasn't a "real" American because I wasn't from either of these beloved states....haha.


2. "How many guns do you have?" Once when I was asked this question for the hundredth time, I got a little bit mean and told the student that in fact I was carrying a gun in my bag at that very moment. The sad thing is....he actually believed me. I had to physically show him the inside of my bag to ease any fears.


3. "Can you use chopsticks?" "Can you eat rice?" "Can you eat Japanese food?"  No matter how many years I have lived here....it seems to boggle the average Japanese student's mind that...gasp...I can use chopsticks! Also, here comes another shocker...we have rice in America! Actually, I'm sure they know that rice exists in America if they really put their mind to it...but the logic escapes them in the beginning. Also, I'm not sure what kind of food you live on in if you are living in Japan, but I'm almost certain some of it must be Japanese.


4. "I hope my son doesn't marry a white person when they study in America, and it would be even worse if they were black!" Now, this one I must say is more of a favorite phrase of my lovely Korean students. I think that even if Japanese students think this...they wouldn't necessarily say it. However, I have been told many a time how terrible it would be if a non-Korean were to enter the family. Really this statement doesn't bother me all that much. Korea is predominately....wait for it....composed of ethnic Koreans...so I'm sure it would upset things quite a bit.


5. "Can you speak Japanese?" This is an absolutely reasonable question, but what I have loved about Japan is that they in NO WAY EXPECT YOU TO SPEAK JAPANESE!! How great is this!! I mean they understand it is a hard language and assume that foreigners haven't taken the time to learn it....could you imagine Americans saying this about English...hah! Now there are two sides to this coin...I know. But since I don't plan on staying here for too much longer, I have decided that this is a good thing.


6. "So you eat McDonald's everyday." This is always in statement rather than question form. I always had to gently break it to the student that....no...we do not eat McDonald's everyday. Instead we go to Taco Bell, Burger King, Arby's, etc...hahaha. Well, I'm sure people don't go every day....but admittedly we Americans (did you see what I did there if you are familiar with Japanese English)...do tend to eat a lot of fast food compared to people in Japan. I wouldn't say this statement is necessarily that unfair.


7. "Why do Americans love war?" I honestly have no idea how to go about this one. Do Americans love war? We have been in a war of some sort or the other for most of my life. Also, isn't history class mainly a string of wars with some social issues sprinkled in between. I always approach this one with the idea of making the world a safer place, blah, blah blah....but I'm not sure if I buy it myself.


8. "My son made a friend in the U.S., but I'm sad that the friend isn't a real American." The first time I heard this one....I was a bit confused. I kindly asked the student to clarify and found out that said friend was of Indian descent. Born and raised in America....but not American in Japanese eyes. Now, this issue runs very deep here in Japan. Even someone born in Japan to one Japanese parent and one foreign parent...may not be considered really Japanese. Yes, I have been told this many, many times. So, it doesn't surprise me that this poor Indian American is not considered a real American....but I always go through my little speech that one of the great things about the U.S. is that if you are born/naturalized there then you are a "real" American. 


9. "Why are American women in porn so scary?" hahaha....this one made me laugh so hard. This poor guy explained how when he watched a U.S. porn he was quite terrified of the actress and didn't find her attractive. Too aggressive he said with all of the yelling....and...well you know. These conversations always just went to really wacky places...because...honestly...I have no explanation for this...cultural I guess? .... hahaha...maybe they are scary.


10. "When will you leave Japan?" Most students that I have met always assumed that I would leave. Not because I had mentioned it...but because they don't expect you to stay here for long. You are expected to go back from whence you came. I never knew how to answer this question because I wasn't really sure if I was leaving Japan...so this always ended up with me asking why they would assume that I would leave.


Now, as you read through all of these it may sound like people are a bit....hmmm...I don't know racist? However, if you inserted U.S. or American for Japan or Japanese....I think the questions aren't really all that different. Do we expect foreigners to go back to their own country? Probably. Do we assume that Japanese people eat sushi all of the time. Yes. Do we ask if a foreign person can speak English. Yes, and we assume that they should (which is beyond ignorant).


So, while I have faced a lot of interesting situations here...I believe that it was all for the better in the end...I have a much better idea of what it is like living as a minority. I honestly feel that no white American can say the same without having truly lived in such a situation for an extended period of time...no matter how many non-white friends you have....you are always looking at it from the viewpoint of the majority...so, overall I've been very thankful for my experiences over the past five years.

Mondays with Mia

Last week we actually made it out twice with baby Mia. The first big event was for her one month check up. This was supposed to be a more detailed check up for premature babies, but in all honesty it wasn't. They just basically told us to keep her inside for 3 more months. No specific reason....just general advice. Well that sounds like a bit long in my opinion, especially since she didn't have any lung problems when she was born....so we have decided not to be on complete quarantine any more! :)

Anywho, Mia did a great job at the doctor's office. She only woke up to be weighed and all of that. I really should have taken pictures at the doctor's office. Next time!

The second big day out was to get her passport photos taken! See the happy family below:

If you would have taken a picture two hours later, you would have seen me and Ten staring daggers at each other...and Mia...probably sleeping as usual. Let's just say that there are probably much easier things in this world than waking a sleeping one month old and then making her stay awake to get her pictures taken....lots of screaming and crying. However, eventually we got it done... Thank God we won't have to ever do that again!!

Here is how her picture turned out:

Excuse my lack of cropping, the shadows, and blurriness. She looks like she is in a baby mugshot...hahaha...

Also, Mia is getting a lot bigger now...which means that she can fit into even more of her clothes. I thought that this outfit was really cute...Ten on the other hand said it was too... provocative...bahaha. I feel for her when she gets older.

Well anyway that is about it for the past week. This coming week we have a few more outings planned. I'm getting so stir crazy staying in the apartment that they are much needed.

However, staying inside with this cutie really isn't all that bad ;)

House Cleaning -- Mentally

I have so many things floating around in my head right now...not sure where to start:

• Have you ever really wanted to eat something....like really bad? An actual craving, but you can't get what you want? I've had that this past couple of days. I am dying for some Taco Bell or some Fazolis. The crazy thing is that I don't even like Fazolis all that much. I call this exhaustion eating.
• On that topic...I've lost about 4 more pounds miraculously. We are on the bento/fast food diet around here recently, so this came as a complete shock.
• I totally missed the eclipse. I talked about waking up to see it, and then that was it. I completely forgot about it until people blogged or Facebooked about it. Oh well....
• So, I do have to share this...got a message from a friend telling me that my blog pics of Mia weren't that cute...hahaha....you can definitely tell that she doesn't have a lot of friends with children....no hard feelings though.
• I finally got my Ergo baby carrier in the mail...but it is still in the box. I'm hoping I get to use it tomorrow when we venture out to get Mia's passport pictures taken...that should be an adventure.
• I really hate my bed recently. I despise my bed. It is a very comfy bed...but it's just too small!! I never had a problem with it before, but now that I see a bigger bed in my future...I just can't stand my current one...I know...odd and unimportant.
• I really need to start putting pics of things on this blog.
• I am very limited when it comes to blogging topics as we are basically quarantined at the moment until after Mia's due date....miserable.
• I'm currently on the fourth book on my reading list: Life on the Mississippi. It's actually really good...but maybe its because I lived in the area so I have a vivid picture of what is going on.
• Currently we are starting the long process or journey of house hunting...I'm not convinced that we are ready to stay in one place (well I'm definitely not), but Ten definitely is...so we will see how it goes.
• Is it crazy I'm already thinking about when to have Baby #2? I thought I would want to wait a good long while...but now I'm not so sure....but it shan't be anytime soon of course.
• I have been mentally planning all of the holidays that we will get to celebrate in the U.S. this year...hoping reality and expectations are in line...hahaha

Anyway, I guess I'll stop here. By the way, thank you for reading to the end of this rambling if you made it. :)

Mondays with Mia

So last week I dropped some burrito on Mia while eating....don't worry it was on her clothes....mostly.

We also didn't bathe her the other night (or two) because we were tired and she was clean...umm...enough.

I must admit that if I hear that a diaper change is in order and Ten will be home in the next 20 minutes...then I conveniently get busy with something else....jokes on him.

I've also been sneaking some caffeine in here and there...I know....it's not ideal.

We have put on her shirt inside out...countless times...

...and maybe worst yet....if she gets a little too wild and loud...then I threaten her....with a trip to her grandma's house....

It makes her panic and she settles down immediately.... ;)

But while things may not be running on Martha Stewart level here at our household....everyone is happy, healthy, fed, and mostly clean... so I think we are doing okay.

Mia at One Month

Dear Mia,

Today you are one month old! However, it feels like you have been with us forever.

Over the past month you have become so much more active. You are awake more often so that means lots more snuggling and playing.

 You have been testing out more of your toys these past few weeks, and while you love your play mat...you still aren't too sure about your bouncer. You can only handle being on it for about 10 minutes at a time.

\

You also love your pink pillow. If you start crying, all we have to do is lay you on it on our laps...and silence...you like to curl up in a little ball and snooze away.

As far as your growth goes, you are now up to 6 pounds and 10 ounces (3 kg). This puts you in the third percentile for your age group (which is okay since we still haven't made it to your due date yet). So, even at one month your newborn clothes are still pretty baggy. However, you have graduated from most of your preemie clothes which is great. Also, you are gaining weight quickly, so we can't wait to see where you are at next month's check up.

Everyone who knows me, say you look more like your mom...but all of your dad's coworkers say that you look like him...we still aren't quite sure yet. Also, your eyes are gray with hints of blue...It will be interesting to see what color they are in a few months time.

At one month some of the other things that you love are baths, classical music, and your daddy singing hush little baby. You are definitely not a fan of diaper changes or sleeping in your baby bed during the day time (nights aren't that bad though).

Thank you so much for joining our little family. You make our days so much better and our nights so much longer (haha).

Love, Your mom and dad

Randomness

• The other day we ordered six cases of water....six cases of water is actually a whole lot when it arrives to your tiny apartment...on the upside...the boxes are making great end tables at the moment.
• I'm seriously contemplating actually spending money on an app. I have previously swore to never waste money on such things...but I really want to start running...and feel that I need an app to help me find the motivation to do it...hmm...that probably makes no sense whatsoever in reality.
• Ten came home the other day from work...looked at my clothes...and said that I looked like a mom...I was absolutely offended...and will have to correct said situation as soon as humanly possible!
• I am so looking forward to the summer!! I love fireworks and summer festivals in Tokyo. However, not sure I will actually get to attend these events....but just knowing they will be going on makes me smile.
• Recently I am loving listening to radio broadcasts from Focus on the Family. Now, I disagree with a majority of their views on social issues...but I find some programs useful...and their extreme conservatism entertaining.
• I have finished 3 out of the first 15 books on my reading list and have started number 4. Going well. However, I found a whole heap of other books that I want to read as well....hmmm...not sure if I should stick with the current list or just read whatever....I think I will stick with it....but I may sneak in an additional book or two....I still have a final goal of 30 so doesn't hurt.

Mondays with Mia

Here is how we spent our past week.


We did a little bit of playing....

a whole lot of sleeping (well she did)...

....and a little bit of dress up.

Hope everyone has a great week!!

Mia's Big Entrance (Part 3)

This may get a little long since I don't want to spread out this story over a million posts.


In the afternoon on April 15, I started to have contractions about every 20 minutes or so. The nurses told us to let them know when they started to come 10 minutes apart. Well Ten left the hospital around 8 pm, and almost as soon as he did....they started to come 10 minutes apart. I informed the nurses....and this is where I started to get irritated...and these nurses are lucky they are still breathing right now. Every time I had a contraction, they would place their hand on my stomach...and they would just say...hmm I don't think it is a contraction. 


I just smiled and said okay, but then they were coming every 5 minutes. I also started puking my brains out...as well as having to use the portable toilet about every 5 minutes....umm talk about the highlight of my life. The nurses just came in and said well it must be false labor. They told me to please stay in bed and everything should settle down. I knew they were wrong, and  the pain was getting much worse. The nurses continued to look confused, and I was starting to wonder if indeed this was a maternity hospital. I let Ten know the situation via What's App, and he told the nurses to call him immediately. In typical Japanese fashion, they said okay and avoided the situation. In the meantime, one nurse came in (who couldn't speak English) with a big binder of translated Japanese to English questions. Now, she could ask the questions (kind of) but couldn't understand the answers....so this was going absolutely nowhere. Also, the questions were so pointless...Example: On a scale of one to ten...what is your pain level? And they asked this question repeatedly. 


They also still refused to call Ten....so he was beyond angry...as it was clear that he was much needed for translation duties. 


Eventually around 1 am, they decided to call the doctor. The doctor told them to double my medicine. Well after an hour, this was having almost no effect. It had only slowed the contractions down to 10 minutes apart or so. So, they busted out the heavy duty stuff. I was on a new medicine and at 4 times the standard amount. My hands were shaking violently and heart was racing....but they assured me that it was a normal side effect and I would survive the night...hahaha. The nurses also said that the evening wouldn't be a good time to have a baby since they were short staffed (think about that before choosing Aiiku)....hahaha. 


The next morning I met with MY doctor. Finally...I was so happy to see her. She did an exam and said that it was not false labor last night and if they hadn't of increased my medicine, then I would have had the baby right then. She said that she wanted to take me off of the meds immediately and get the baby out since the situation could become dangerous to the both of us. She was especially worried about a serious infection or the cord putting pressure on Mia's neck. She said that I could wait for my husband to arrive to decide, but I told her to go ahead and stop it.


Ten arrived around 9:30 am or so, and at about 10:00 I had gone into labor....AGAIN...yes, fun times really. I had not slept for almost 3 days at this point. I was also told by my doctor that I would be hooked to monitors during the entire delivery and would not be able to move through any of my contractions....so it was bound to be highly painful and uncomfortable. Everyone agreed that an epidural would be my best bet (epidurals are extremely uncommon in Japan, so it was a bit surprising that everyone was on board with this).


So, I got the epidural at 1:00. I was finally able to sleep for a little bit, and Ten and I listed to some Kesha and Lil Wayne....yeah the doctors and nurses probably thought we were nuts. We were also dancing....well Ten was...and I was just doing motions with my hands....Ten also started to complain that labor was kind of boring at this point....no more drama  now that the baby was on her way....haha. I was happy with boring though.


Finally, a new doctor came in. This was the doctor who would deliver the baby. Our hospital is a maternity hospital, so they work in shifts. My doctor was doing check ups that day but not delivering babies. We were okay with that, but this new doctor was terrible. She came in and didn't speak to us or even tell us her name. She just walked right in and proceeded to see how far along I was. I was pretty unhappy and so was Ten. She also talked about how they wouldn't give me any more pain meds because a natural childbirth would be safer. Now, this was the exact opposite of what my doctor had suggested...and let's just say that this did not go over well with Ten.


Ladies and gents this is where it got a bit dramatic again, he kicked the doctor out of the delivery room. He yelled at her...something about if she was making a cultural decision and not a medical one...then he didn't care and he wanted them to keep the pain meds flowing freely. Blah, blah, blah and a lot more angry Japanese and she left the room. Yet, this wasn't good enough...he was also sick of the incompetent nurses (yes, they were quite terrible to be honest)...and proceeded to kick all of the nurses out as well....This just left me and Ten...and I was wondering which one of us was going to have to catch the baby at this point.


Eventually, they decided to send in only the head nurse as well as our doctor (Dr. Kawana). Dr. Kawana was amazing, and we delivered Mia at 5:16 on April 16. She started crying immediately and weighed in at 4.9 pounds.


We didn't get to hold her though. The NICU team immediately rushed her away to do a 3 hour evaluation where she got her feeding tube inserted, checked her brain for bleeding, etc. After 3 hours, Ten was able to go to the NICU. I on the other hand was told that I had to lay in bed for 8 hours and could see Mia the next day. This didn't fly well with me, so I pretended not to understand and snuck out and went to the NICU as well. The nurses caught me after a few hours and tried to make me get in a wheel chair to go back to my room. I began to speak to Ten quickly in English in order to intimidate them into leaving me alone and letting me at least walk back to my room. I kind of feel guilty about that, but I mean....I had a baby...I didn't go through war. I felt fine.


As a side note...women in Japan are kind of pitiful after having a baby. They walk around the halls like they can barely move and stay in the hospital for 5 days. The nurses were shocked that I was walking normally the next day and asked to be discharged. Being discharged early caused a long argument....but eventually I was free of the hospital after a mere 8 days. 


The next post I will do...to end this giant recap...will be brief...some photos of Mia's time in the NICU and GCU.

Mia's Big Entrance (Part 2)

The first three days in the M/FICU were pretty uneventful but extremely stressful. I was on strict bed rest and couldn't even get up to take a shower or go to the bathroom. Instead they brought this little portable toilet next to my bed and I had to ring the nurses when it needed cleaning. Yeah...not my idea of a good time.


I had daily doctor check ups and was told that I was very lucky that the baby was already head down or I would have had to have a C-section immediately. She still had enough fluid to stay in longer, but I was monitored daily for contractions, her growth, fluid levels, etc. My image of bed rest and the reality were much different. I got to do very little resting really with all of the tests going on. 


We also had meetings with the head doctor of the NICU as well as the head nurse. The doctor was extremely pessimistic giving us all kinds of worse case scenarios and explaining how the baby would most likely be looking at a lengthy NICU stay....until her due date...so six weeks. As a doctor, maybe he had to say these things...but it did extremely little to ease our anxiety. He also told us that indeed 34 weeks is an arbitrary number and maybe Mia's lungs wouldn't be as developed as we would like. After that, we met with the head nurse of the NICU. This lady was like an angel...She explained that babies at this stage had few problems and could even go home around 36 weeks. She also brought in a big photo album with success stories of babies who were born at much earlier stages than ours. A complete 180 from the doctor. Nevertheless, we were both extremely stressed and not at all sure how things would play out when the time came. 


We also got to meet with doctors talking about risk of C-section, blood transfusions, infections, etc. The anesthesiologist also came in and talked about what indeed would happen if an emergency C-section was necessary, and she talked about pain medications available during labor. 


Overall, we were extremely busy for the first 3 or 4 days trying to get everything figured out. Ten and I were hoping at this point that I may be able to even last longer than the 34 week mark since I wasn't having any signs of going into labor. We were becoming a bit more optimistic about our chances and hoping a mind over matter approach would work for us. On April 16, I would be 34 weeks and we were going to meet with our doctor to decide what course of action we would take regarding the medicine that I was on to stop labor. However, on the afternoon of April 15, our decision was slowly but surely being made for us.


Note to anyone looking for an English speaking hospital to have a baby at in Japan: All of the information was presented to us in both English and in Japanese. The staff did their absolute best to communicate everything in both languages up to this point. However, there were several times when the conversation switched to pure Japanese since Ten is a Japanese speaker and the nurses assumed that my Japanese was good enough to at least follow the main points of the conversation. However, I am confident that Aiiku Hospital will do their absolute best to communicate everything in English if you have no understanding of Japanese and are not with a Japanese speaker....however, there are some major drawbacks to this hospital....which I will talk about in later posts.

Summer Reading - Part 1

I used to be or or am an avid reader. I'm not sure which sentence is the more correct one, but I have definitely gotten out of the habit of reading recently. It's really too bad, but with 40 minute nursing sessions currently completely taking over my life I've found that I have huge chunks of time where I am glued to the couch
and a sleepy baby. So with this in mind, I am giving myself a bit of a summer reading challenge. I plan on reading 30 books in the next three months. This is really an arbitrary number and considering I just read one book in two days it probably isn't much of a challenge. However a number will keep me on track.


So here are the first 15 books I plan on reading:


The Hunger Games Trilogy: Yes I know I'm a bit behind. I also didn't read Harry Potter or Twilight until after a while either....but I eventually got around to it. I've already finished the first in this series, and I am absolutely hooked.


The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks, The Life of Pi, Blindness, Trylle Trilogy, and Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children: I honestly don't know a whole lot about any of these books really; however, they were all recommended to me by Facebook friends. I figure since they took the time to give me some good ideas, then I will take the time to read them. Also, I like seeing and knowing what interests others, so I'm really looking forward to these.


Madame Bovary (have I read this already? maybe), Life on the Mississippi, Emma, Uncle Tom's Cabin, and Don Quixote: I will admit that these books aren't what you would consider to be light reading, but I love classics. These are usually the kind of books that I hope will never end. Also, the added bonus of them being free doesn't hurt either.


Anyway, so these are the first 15 books that I plan on reading this summer. And no, I'm not planning on doing any type of book review after I finish each one...but you never know. I also do have some ideas for the next 15 that I want to read too but I am definitely open to suggestions.


Any other books that are must reads?

Mia's Big Entrance (Part 1)

On April 11, Ten and I finally made our way over to the hospital to do a tour of the Labor and Delivery ward. We figured that it was about time to do it. We made our way over to the hospital (Aiiku Byoin) and joined the tour. 

We saw the delivery rooms, the rooms that you stay in, etc. Pretty boring overall, and they even showed us a special room. The room was right next to the nurses station and was for those with complications and immediate high risk deliveries/pregnancies. We kind of glanced at it and both made the comment that we probably wouldn't need it so no point really paying attention....bahahaha. Fast forward about  6 hours later.

Yes ladies and gentlemen...there are my legs....sitting in the Maternal/Fetal Intensive Care Unit.

When we got back from the hospital...we continued our day as normal...and then around 9 pm or so....I decided to go to bed. After about half an hour or so I got up to use the bathroom....and my water broke. I would say that we weren't panicked really...I told Ten that he should probably call the hospital and ask what we should do. Ten called them up and said that I was 33 weeks pregnant and that we had thought that my water had broke. Their reply was something along the lines about how that was too early...but to come in for a check up anyway and try not to move around too much. I told Ten that maybe I had just peed myself and was to ignorant to realize it....hahaha...or at least I hoped that was what happened.

We hopped into a taxi and made our way over to the hospital. I was diagnosed with PPROM (which only happens in less than 3% of pregnancies) and told that I would be hospitalized (in that special room) and on bed rest until the baby came. They pumped me full of meds that would stop contractions and said that we were going to try to at least make it to 34 weeks. However, the important thing was to make it a day longer...each day I didn't have the baby was a milestone. 

Ten headed back home for the night, and we began our 5 day journey in the Maternal/Fetal Intensive Care Unit.